Once upon a time (in about 1991) I took a young, neat and tidy, first-time homebuyer couple into the messiest house on the planet. I had told them about it, but it was cute at the end of a cul-se-sac, etc., etc. and they wanted to see it. It took them about 30 seconds to turn on their heels and leave. That’s at one end of the continuum of presentation, with the model home, staged by experts at the other end.
But truth to tell, we live in the middle, don’t we? We’re neither slobs nor showcases, so the question becomes what can we sellers do, thinking like buyers, to make our product, this widget that’s going on the shelf in the house store with a pretty pink ribbon on it, stand out from the rest? What can we do (or not do) to have the buyers’ faces light up when they walk in and help them to feel at home? We want them measuring the far wall for their sectional, don’t we?
As with a lot of things, it’s easier to say what not to do. It’s easier to say what has people, if not literally then emotionally, turn on their heels and flee. So let’s have a look at some; some doozies, some easily overlooked.
Work: Buyers don’t want any and they “horribilize” (a word I learnt in my first year of real estate; love it). Well, if the Sellers didn’t take care of that leaking faucet, what else didn’t they take care of? If this house has spider nests above the front door, what else is lurking elsewhere? You get the picture: the Agent’s fiddling with the keybox and the Buyers are “horribilizing”.
Wall/fridge décor: We love our grandchildren, I dearly love my grandson (just 9 months’ old and sooooo cute!), but so do Buyers and, I hate to say this, their Agents. So, they’re looking at little Dominick and not at the house. And let’s not even think about the pink tulle hats, moose heads, guns, nudes, Toll paintings. A Seller coined a lovely word for her ‘disease’ – Flatitis. If a surface was flat, she wanted to put stuff on it; she willingly desisted for the duration of the sale.
Yards: There was this TV show for tiny tots in the England when I was growing up. It had 3 characters, Weed and two Flowerpot Men. Oh, and the Gardener, who was only seen from the knees down. None of these characters could speak and, in retrospect, it was pretty pathetic, so the message is – no Weeds! I was a teenager and we were merciless in our criticism.
Enough of this. It’s that emotional separation from “home” to “house”, where the “house” is a widget we’re selling. And such a warm, inviting, pretty widget it is too. As one Seller signed off, “With our hopes up and our toilet seats down”! Yes, toilet lids do need to be down – are you listening, guys?
